Thursday, October 06, 2011

“I wanted to be...” a story of dying dreams...

Yesterday, while traveling in Delhi Metro, I overheard a boy talking on phone. He was, I guess, some 24-25 years of age. He was dressed well, decent and sober. But there was something that was bothering him. I don't know what, but I could sense it from his appearance and talks that he was tensed, even on the auspicious occasion of Durga Puja. A part of it, that I actually want to discuss today, was as follows... (most of the conversation was in Hindi, I am translating that in English for the sake of my readers)


“...I don't know yaar, but I never thought it to be this way. I wanted to be a careless youngster for some more time, all this time I have worked hard towards my 'goal' (I am not specifying) thinking that I will get whatever I want once I achieve this. But now this situation has forced me to change, to something what I am not... I wanted to stay a kid for some more time, but suddenly I have to take all decisions now.. God only knows what He was thinking while writing a destiny for me...”

There was more, but that is not important in this context (I think in my next post I will discuss some more of this boy relating to another matter). My point is that how many of us have dead dreams??? or rather I should ask how many of us have actually achieved even 50% of what we have dreamed of??? It all starts with a damn toy...yes...toy... when we are kids, we dream of having GI Joes or hotwheels or the full set of barbie doll house or something else... (I am talking from the point of view of a kid in a middle class Indian Family). Some of them were fulfilled by our angels like father and/or mother while most of them died out. Long forgotten. Then we get the first lesson on what to expect and what not to. But we were children that time, so we do not hesitate to dream, and dream big...Dreaming and breaking and then again dreaming... Then we reach a stage called youth...we want to become a doctor, but most of us settle with an M.Sc., we want to go to IIT, but most of us have to settle with other Engineering colleges. Then after Masters, some of us dream big.. of getting a PhD from a reputed institute, and then come Mr. Fate and and offer you a job, and create some situations that you cannot resist and later repent...

I am not talking about those who just dream and never act... It is their own fault. Their dreams break because of them. What I am talking about is those people who dream, work, but meet an accident on day of exam, fall ill, or simply do something unwillingly because their family wants them to do so. I remember an example of an acquaintance of mine when I was preparing for medicals in Kota. He qualified AIPMT with good rank, threw his certificate in front of his parents and said, “you wanted me to clear PMT, here it is, I did it. Now I want to become an engineer and so enroll my name into Class 11th once again with maths so that I can do what I want”. This was talk of the town back then. Seriously, I never had that much courage. So I am talking about such people who dream, act and fail again and again and those who dream, want to act, but situations don't allow them to do so...

I am sure some of you will say that there are no excuses if someone wants to work hard. But Let me inform you, we are all humans and have feelings, care for friends, family and there are situations which can badly disturb more than 80% of you (may be 20% are so professional or heartless not to get disturbed by anything). Why God,if you are somewhere, why do you kill so many dreams which sometimes even have resulted in killing of people??? Aren't you there somewhere???

Well... I guess God won't be reading this blog... so, never mind... thought...so shared...

- Crazy Mind...

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